by All of Us
Thanksgiving is going to look weird this year. Really the entire rest of the year is going to look weird. Generally, each year Zack and I switch off holidays—one year it’s Thanksgiving with his family, Christmas with mine, and then we swap the next year. In almost six years of dating, this will be the first time we celebrate this holiday (and potentially Christmas) alone, but together. Zack loves Thanksgiving (and loves eating), but now we’ve made the decision to not travel, to not be another part of the problem. And that’s freaking sad! Even though I’m not the most family-centered person out there, I respect Zack’s dedication to his family. Being forced to change decades-old and longer traditions is upsetting, especially when everything is so, so terrifying.
In our last collab before breaking for the holidays, the topic was simple: What are we grateful for? This question is passed around every year, but I’ve never felt more inclined to pause and think about my answer. There’s a lot to still be grateful for, even though I can find myself crying any given day, so we wanted to take up space in our writing and in our brains to list the most important things and people to us. Let’s spread the love!
Shelby’s Grateful For…
BANSHEE
I know, it’s a given to say I’m grateful for my dog, but dammit I’m gonna say it anyway. I fucking love this dog. So Boodle Boy, I’m grateful for you for constantly making me laugh with the way your feet fur grows to look like you’re wearing elf shoes. I’m grateful for how important walks are to you because you get me out of the house, into the fresh air, moving my body. I’m grateful you are a stage seven clinger and legit never leave me alone because I don’t want to be alone.
SYDNEY, AIMÉE, KAYLA
A Trust Fund has been hard. Running a newsletter is so much harder than I thought. I’m constantly in fear of no one reading, therefore making all of this meaningless. I often doubt my writing, but through A Trust Fund and through you three, I’m learning how to be proud of the good things I write, acknowledge the not so good, and the importance of taking the time to write. This can and will be my craft and I can only do it with you.
EVA, BRITTANI, LIZZY, MAGGIE, ADDISON
The coworkers I am so happy to call friends. You guys are the only reason I show up to work. Lush can eat a dick, but man I’d die for each of you. You all shine in such different and dazzling ways and I love that I get to know you. Eva, you’re my best friend in Ohio (besides Zack). You fucking get me. Brittani, you are the sexiest mama I’ve ever known and I just love you and Winry so goddamn much. You are going to raise such an incredible girl. Lizzy, we have the most ridiculous conversations that always end with us dying of laughter in front of customers. Your flash and flare always remind me to be authentically me and that I love doing whacky shit with makeup. Maggie, you’ve been a fantastic manager through all of this shit storm, always prioritizing your team’s needs. Personally, you’ve shown me secret ways art and beauty are hidden in the world and that there just maybe something to believe in. And Addison, we haven’t been friends long but I love how you find optimism and joy in everything. You’re always smiling, always telling a joke, and always feeling every emotion possible. You remind me that my brain can and will be against me, but I’m stronger than it.
ZACK
I mean, where do I begin? I get nervous when I try to formulate cute, romantic things to say and I feel like it’s never perfect. You have been so influential in creating the person I am today. Yes, did I steal your style and your music? Sure, but hey, what if I didn’t like your music, then what would you do? But you’ve also shared your wealth of knowledge with me and I know more about the world because of you. You help me challenge my assumptions of men and what a relationship in 2020 and beyond could look like. You’ve been my main support system for any and all endeavors I have dragged you along on. You’re my favorite person to talk with. You’re my favorite person to be alive with.
Aimée’s Grateful For…
MIKE
Peek behind the curtain time…I’m writing my portion of this collab after both Shelby and Kayla (even though my section is appearing above Kayla’s). That being said, I guess I should write about my significant other since they wrote about theirs. Lol jk! I’ve been so incredibly grateful for Mike for the past four years of my life. I don’t think I could have survived grad school, my first year of teaching, and the months of quarantine without him by my side. I don’t want to sound too cliché, but there really is no one else I’d rather spend my time with. That being said, I’m also grateful that Mike is as independent as I am. We’re the type of couple that likes to be near each other…but doing different things. We have shows we watch together, but shows we watch on our own. We have games we play together, but games we play on our own. You get the idea. We sometimes even eat separate meals…together. It’s what works for us! I’m just so thankful we’re always on the same page, and that he’s never been afraid to communicate his feelings to me. Ever since day 1—literally, day 1—he’s been an open book with me. I still don’t know how I got so lucky.
MY COWORKERS
My school really has the best community feel. We just switched to being temporarily fully remote yesterday, which is a bit of a bummer, but I’m still so thankful to be in this with my wonderful coworkers. We won’t get to do Friday afternoon outdoor happy hour for a while, but we have other ways of virtually supporting each other through this mess.
MY SWEET BABIES (AKA MY STUDENTS)
My students are such a blessing this year. They’re kind, respectful, and willing to work (for the most part). I really hope I get to teach them in person again soon. They make me feel alive as I teach them each day.
MY FRIENDS
Y’all know who you are. Thanks for the Zoom calls, WhatsApp group texts, and Snapchats. I don’t get to see most of you very often, but I always feel like you’re with me.
Kayla’s Grateful For…
Let’s be real, this year has been incredibly difficult. Between the ongoing pandemic and the stressful election, at times, I honestly thought this year would never end. However, it is now the end of November, and 2021 is just on the horizon. The holiday season is in full swing and I am prepping intensely for my favorite holiday (Thanksgiving)! In a time where so much is still up in the air—when will we get a COVID vaccine, when will cases start declining, when will life start returning to “normal”—I think it is so important to take a step back and think about all of the things we are grateful for. Every day I find myself grateful for different things because it really is necessary to focus on some positives every once in a while.
MARC
This one is a complete no-brainer. Marc has been my rock for years now, and that is not something that has stopped this year. He is the calm to my storm and he is always ready to sit me down and tell me I am overreacting and need to calm down. Sometimes, my type-A personality really needs that. He pretty much keeps me in line and always puts our little family first. I know that if I am every feeling overwhelmed or upset he will jump in the car to go grab my favorite meal: tacos and queso. There have been a lot of times this year when I have felt like I was spiraling out of control, but he has always helped me remain grounded and reminded me to keep pressing forward. For him, I am forever grateful!
MY FURRY COWORKERS
My cats are my world. Honestly, there isn’t much more to say except I will always be grateful for a fuzzy belly to shove my face into during a long day. Yup, I said it, I love shoving my face into a warm, fluffy kitty belly. I’m not gonna lie, while I love working from home, it definitely gets very lonely at times. I sit in my house all day with nobody to really talk to, but my cats definitely make it more bearable. I find myself taking short breaks to play with them, pet them, and take cute photos for Snapchat. I think if I was completely alone all day I would truly go insane, so having my adorable fuzzy coworkers by my side has been a true blessing!
ATF
Writing for ATF has been a big change for me this year and I could not be happier! Having a solid support system of strong women around is something that I have been grateful for all year. Just having a place to put my writing out for the world to see with three other amazing women has been incredible. Although I’ve known Aimée for years, I feel like I have gained two new friends with Shelby and Sydney. Our collab pieces and Zoom calls help break up the monotony of my day and give me something to look forward to during my week. I am so grateful to these lovely ladies who put up with me and even support me when I want to write about random topics…like soup!
There are so many other things I am grateful for this year that it is hard not to list them all. I am grateful for my family supporting me during my job transition, I am grateful for my friends who are always up for a good movie night, I am grateful for my Peloton that helps me blow of some steam after a stressful day (yup, I’m still riding it!). I could honestly write pages on the things I am grateful for, but will stick with brevity for now. Thank you to everyone who reads our thought-out words, daily suggestions, and sometimes childish banter…just wait until we talk about Christmas movies! We are so grateful for you, readers!
Shit We’re Loving: PEOPLE
Our Pick: You! The readers!
Hi, I’m not exactly sure how many of you there are—I know Ryan and Lizzy, at least for the most part, have stuck around this long—but we are all super grateful for you. Thank you for opening our emails and sending our Substack numbers up, even if you just skim and delete. Thank you for sharing in our laughter, tears, and frustration throughout the year so far. Thank you for contributing in ways you don’t even realize you are. Thank you for forcing us to continue reaching, continue writing, and continue being. You’re the best. Happy Thanksgiving, y’all.
Show Your Support: She’s the First
Our wonderful Aimée got to pick this month’s charity, and this one is totally special. She’s the First is a community founded on the sole belief that every girl, no matter where she is born, deserves to be educated, respected, and heard. She’s the First is made up of advocates and teachers, artists and politicians, resilient mothers and feminist fathers, and of course, the girls.
In everything we do, we put girls' voices at the center of conversations that affect their lives and support communities to drive their own transformation.
Their mission is simple: Create a world where every girl chooses her own future. Why, you may ask? Because in too many places around the world, girls are treated as second to boys. They are denied education, told who and when to marry, and blocked from leadership. Educated and respected girls are the exception, not the norm. Just take a look at these statistics from UNICEF:
In the A Trust Fund fashion, we have already donated $100 to the cause and suggest you do the same. Are you as violated by the new laws and words spoken in Poland against women? We have to start somewhere, and building up and supporting girls now is how we make that change. Go follow, get educated, and donate! Us girls need you.
Daily Intention
Today I will…
Tell someone I appreciate them.
Here’s some nifty buttons for you to press, enjoy: