What's the Glee cast singing?
I'm so sorry...
Look, I think it is important to establish that in 2010 I would not be caught dead listening to a non-Glee version of a song. In the 2010 timeline, Glee was the music industry. It’s not like I didn’t know Glee was problematic when it was airing, but I thought it was more funny and edgy than anything else. Now reflecting on the show, plus a failed attempt to bask in the nostalgia with a rewatch, I realize that Glee’s success was founded on completely crossing the line.
What Glee did give us was a never ending source of content to make fun of on TikTok. GleeTok, as I am sure it is called, is filled with a never ending stream of millennials asking themselves, “Who would perform this song on Glee?”
The inspiration for this piece specifically came from this TikTok video where a content creator and Glee super fan established that Blaine, played by Darren Criss, would definitely be performing Harry Styles’ new single “As It Was”. This got me thinking about what popular, no doubt TikTok-trending, songs would the cast of Glee perform? For context, some of these choices reflect an alternate universe and others are canon!
Drivers License by Olivia Rodrigo
You cannot tell me Rachel wouldn’t sing “Drivers License” during one of her many dramatic, trying-to-be-deep performances where she is no doubt singing in the hallways of McKinley High School where she is now a Glee Club coach and having an affair with one of the other teachers. Since this is in the future timeline of Glee, I am also going to predict it is a guidance counselor to mirror the Mr. Schue/Emma dynamic in the earlier seasons.
Levitating by Dua Lipa
Picture it: it’s another Pop Divas theme week where Rachel and Kurt are going head to head on the artists they should be featured. Rachel wants to go more current and Kurt wants to represent the more OG divas. The club splits into two groups with each of their coaches and Rachel’s group prepares “Levitating” by Dua Lipa.
Kiss Me More by Doja Cat feat. SZA
Santana and Brittany. I will not be elaborating.
Easy On Me by Adele
This would be a contender for nationals, with Kurt and Rachel competing for the solo. The resulting performance would be a duet edited together of their individual performances.
THATS WHAT I WANT by Lil Nas X
This won’t make sense in the context of whatever is going on in the episode, but the producers are going to throw a bone to that one guy in the club who is just there for filler, but can actually rap (kind of). Maybe it is another cringe assembly performance. The producers just want to use a Lil Nas X song tbh.
Leave The Door Open by Silk Sonic (Bruno Mars and Anderson .Paak)
It’s a boys vs. girls week and the boys are pulling out all the stops for this performance. The audience will not think twice about how its mostly a bunch of white dudes singing an R&B slow jam. Puck is definitely trying to flirt with Rachel during the performance.
Midnight Sky by Miley Cyrus
In response to the boys, the girls pull out this powerhouse performance with relatively equal performances from all the girls, which is a rarity on the show.
Bad Guy by Billie Eilish
Sanatana is going to be feeling very attacked in this episode so she is going to bust out into this song during a glee club meeting. However, Santana can’t pull off the husky whisper-singing from Billie’s first album so it’s not going to sound right.
Bad Habits by Ed Sheeran
This will be sung by The Warblers featuring Blaine on lead vocals. The Warblers’ whole schtick is that they are an all-male a-cappella group so a lot of their songs are flirtatious performances. I could see them singing this to the girls in New Directions when the glee club crashes their rehearsal to assess on the competition.
Sucker by Jonas Brothers
After months of back and forth with Rachel, Finn is finally ready to admit his feelings for her and stop hiding. The way he decides to do this is by performing this during a glee club meeting. The best part will be all the other members’ disgusted faces while he sings this to a starry-eyed Rachel.
You can listen to all of these songs (plus a few more I think the cast of Glee would definitely cover) here.
Shit We’re Loving:
Sydney’s Pick: The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern
I am so excited to announce the first pick for the Our Trust Fund Book Club! On May 6th we will be releasing our thoughts on the book, but in the meantime all the girls are busy reading this fantastic tale.
The book is described as “a timeless love story set in a secret underground world—a place of pirates, painters, lovers, liars, and ships that sail upon a starless sea.” So far I am loving the story. It reminds me of Neil Gaiman’s writing, who just so happens to be one of my favorite authors!
Pick up a copy of The Starless Sea wherever you buy books or at your local library and join us on May 6th to hear what we thought of the book!
Show Your Support: Futures Without Violence
Can you imagine a world where everyone—particularly women and children—feels completely safe? It may seem out of reach, but that’s exactly what the health and social justice nonprofit org Futures Without Violence strives for.
It’s Women’s History Month, so we wanted to choose a spotlight organization that helps women in a particular way. Though FWV doesn’t only provide aid to women, much of their work does focus on preventing and ending human trafficking and domestic violence faced by women. One especially smart and interesting thing FWV does is provide education and outreach to boys and men in an effort to prevent and/or stop the cycle of domestic violence.
Futures Without Violence isn’t just trying to raise awareness about the various forms of violence faced by so many in our world. They take action:
Striving to reach new audiences and transform social norms, we train professionals such as doctors, nurses, judges, and athletic coaches on improving responses to violence and abuse. We also work with advocates, policymakers, and others to build sustainable community leadership and educate people everywhere about the importance of respect and healthy relationships.
Our vision is a future without violence that provides education, safety, justice, and hope.
The amount of work FWV does is pretty astounding. We invite you to check out their website for a plethora of resources and information on what they do and how YOU can help.
In typical OTF fashion, we have donated $50 to Futures Without Violence already and encourage you all to give what you can! Together, with many thanks to FWV, we CAN live in a world where domestic violence is a thing of the past.
Daily Intention:
Today I choose…
to be productive.
Here’s some nifty buttons for you to press, enjoy: